Learn what topics you should avoid during small talk in Korean
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Intro |
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| Michael: What topics are taboo in Korea? |
| Kyejin: And what are some things you should avoid doing? |
| Michael: At KoreanClass101.com, we hear these questions often. Consider the following situation: Karen Morris and So-yeong Seo are chatting in a good atmosphere while drinking coffee. Everything changes when Karen asks the forbidden question, |
| "Who is your favorite politician?" |
| Karen Morris: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| Dialogue |
| Karen Morris: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| So-yeong Seo: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: Once more with the English translation. |
| Karen Morris: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? |
| Michael: "Who is your favorite politician?" |
| So-yeong Seo: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: "Um...can we talk about something else?" |
Lesson focus |
| Michael: Learning a language is an amazing experience. It makes it possible for us to expand our horizons and range of association, and, throughout our studies, we come into close contact with the culture of the land where the language is widely spoken. Language can’t be explained without the culture, and, oftentimes, the language gives insight into typical cultural phenomena. Actually, language and culture are closely interwoven, and this is evident in expressions and phrases either habitually spoken or avoided. In this lesson, we are going to focus specifically on the latter part--taboos. In Korean, |
| Kyejin: 금기 (geumgi), |
| Michael: literally meaning "something forbidden or avoided for religious or secular reasons” or just "taboo." |
| Taboo language is called |
| Kyejin: 금기어 (geumgieo) |
| Michael: We also use an English loan word |
| Kyejin: 터부 (teobu) |
| Michael: which is defined as “a word or an act that is forbidden within a certain group or society.” |
| [Recall 1] |
| Michael: Let’s take a closer look at the dialogue. |
| Do you remember how Karen says "Who is your favorite politician?" |
| Kyejin: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| Michael: First, the phrase |
| Kyejin: 가장 좋아하는 (gajang joahaneun) |
| Michael: stands for “favorite” or “like the most”. Next, politician is |
| Soyoen: 정치인 (jeongchiin) |
| Michael: in Korean. The topic marking particle |
| Kyejin: 은 (eun) |
| Michael: was added afterwards, thus raising “favorite politician” as the topic. Then, Karen finishes her question with the phrase |
| Soyoen: 누구예요? (nuguyeyo?), |
| Michael: meaning “who (is)?” Thus, Karen’s question literally means “Most like politician who is?”, and it translates as “Who is your favorite politician?” |
| Karen Morris: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| [Recall 2] |
| Michael: Now, let’s take a look at our second sentence. |
| Do you remember how So-yeong Seo says "Um...can we talk about something else?" |
| (pause 4 seconds) |
| Kyejin: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: So-yeong doesn’t give a person’s name in response; instead, she starts with “Um…”, |
| Kyejin: 음… (eum…) |
| Michael: indicating her hesitation. Could it be that she doesn’t know who to mention? She says something further, and it becomes quite obvious why she felt reluctant to answer. She says, |
| Kyejin: 다른 얘기 할까요? (dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: which literally translates as “different story tell may (we)?”, and it can be put as “Can we talk about something else?” in English. So-yeong didn’t spell out her feelings in a straightforward way, but her remark clearly reflects how she views political topics—they are not preferred. |
| So-yeong Seo: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| [Summary] |
| Michael: So-yeong could have been blunt with Karen, saying “I don’t like political topics”, |
| Kyejin: 정치 얘기 싫어요. (Jeongchi yaegi sireoyo.) |
| Michael: But she takes an indirect approach in conveying her thoughts. |
| Soyoen as So-yeong Seo: 음… 다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: We can assume that So-yeong didn’t want to offend Karen, but, at the same time, she tried to make her stance clear on what she considers as taboos. Taboos can sometimes be somewhat subjective, so we know it makes no sense to stereotype. There are always exceptions, and actually everyone is different! But we all agree that it would be wise to avoid topics that are highly controversial or not welcomed by a big majority of the population, right? And it will also be a plus for you if you can handle the situation tactfully when someone raises a topic you view as a taboo. Here are some commonly found situations. Let’s say Cheolsu is having a family gathering with his relatives. He’s been single for a couple of years, and, whenever his relatives are over, he’s repeatedly asked by older ones: “When are you getting married?” |
| Kyejin: “언제 결혼할래?” (Eonje gyeolhonhallae?) |
| Michael: He’s stayed silent for past years but thinks he can’t anymore. So he chooses to speak up and let them know that the question didn’t sound nice to him by saying, |
| Kyejin: 음… 다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: Then, the relatives will catch that he doesn’t want to get pushed about the relationship. How about when someone starts mentioning a grievous, violent criminal case: “Did you hear about the case?” |
| Soeyon: “그 사건 얘기 들었어?” (Sarin sageon yaegi deureosseo?) |
| Michael: You’ve already seen it on the news over and over, and it’s so bad that you don’t want to talk about it anymore. Then, you may simply reply, |
| Kyejin: 음… 다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: At your work, your colleague starts talking about your other workmate’s religion: “You know Mr. Kim’s religious background?” |
| Kyejin: 김대리 종교가 뭔지 알아? (Gimdaeri jongyoga mwonji ara?) |
| Michael: And you don’t want to get involved in talking about someone else’s religion. So you answer back, |
| Kyejin: 음… 다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Expansion |
| Michael: Generally, topics like |
| Kyejin: 종교 (jonggyo) |
| Michael: "religion" or |
| Kyejin: 죽음 (jugeum) |
| Michael: "death" seem to be considered taboo in Korea, especially in formal settings. Speaking of death, there are some superstitions regarding this in Korean society. For example, some of the apartments do not have room numbers that end with 4. Some buildings substitute the 4th floor button on the elevator with the English alphabet F. Why? Because the Sino-Korean number “four” and the Chinese character |
| Kyejin: 한자 (Hanja) |
| Michael: for “death” have the same pronunciation |
| Kyejin: 사 [四&死] (sa). |
| Micheal: So you’ll be able to see that number 4 has been avoided in some places in Korea. Also, there’s an idea that Koreans are familiar with in which a person will die if his/her name is written in red, or |
| Kyejin: 빨간색 (bbalgansaek). |
| Michel: So some avoid writing their names in red. But, really, the key to avoiding a taboo for someone lies in understanding a person as an individual and putting yourself in his/her shoes. Let’s say your friend is about to take an important exam or apply for a job. If you mention too much about failure or are negative or skeptical about the success, then your friend might tell you this old saying, |
| Kyejin: 말이 씨가 된다. (Mari ssiga doenda.) |
| Michael: It literally means “Words become seed.”, so basically it conveys the idea that “Every word has power”. So, until your friend gets the result, it would be better to not give repeated reminders about failures. |
| Review |
| Michael: Let's review. Respond to the prompts by speaking aloud. Then, repeat after Kyejin focusing on pronunciation. |
| Do you remember how Karen Morris says "Who is your favorite politician?" |
| Kyejin: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| Michael: Listen again and repeat. |
| Kyejin: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| Kyejin: 가장 좋아하는 정치인은 누구예요? (Gajang joahaneun jeongchiineun nuguyeyo?) |
| Michael: And do you remember how So-yeong Seo says ”Um... Let's talk about something else?" |
| Kyejin: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: Listen again and repeat. |
| Kyejin: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Kyejin: 음...다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Cultural Insight/Expansion |
| Michael: The sentence we focused on today was “Um...can we talk about something else?” |
| Kyejin: 음… 다른 얘기 할까요? (Eum...dareun yaegi halkkayo?) |
| Michael: While it’s true that it’s a sugarcoated way of avoiding a topic compared to frankly saying that you don’t want to talk anymore, some people still might feel rejected or even get offended that their question or remark got turned down. So, unless your company says something totally against your morals or you need to firmly defend yourself, your words would be more presentable if you deliver them with a warm smile. Another way to imply a silent “no-no” to questions on your taboo topic is delaying your answer with an awkward smile. Then, the other person will catch that you don’t want to further the topic unless he/she has zero |
| Kyejin: 눈치 (nunchi) |
| Michael: “ability to take a hint” or |
| Kyejin: 예의 (yeeui) |
| Michael: “manners.” |
Outro |
| Michael: Do you have any more questions? We’re here to answer them! |
| Kyejin: 안녕히 계세요. (annyeonghi gyeseyo). |
| Michael: See you soon! |
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